*yawn*

Who knew having newborn dropped off at your doorstep would be just as tiring as having a newborn yourself?  Haha   We've been keeping busy to say the least.  The day after Alli came home, Pete and the girls went to the Cape.  I had some time to get acquainted with Alli at home while they were gone.  Then the following week the girls started school.  Those things plus Alli has had 4 doctors appts in 2 weeks...holy busy and tired. 

The girls are AMAZING with Alli - they treat her like she's always belonged here and they're so loving and gentle with her.  It really has astonished me.  I thought maybe they would show some jealousy or regress a bit but they haven't shown any of that.  Nothing but pure love for child. 

After 3 weeks (yes that's THREE) we finally have a social worker.  We just got a call tonight and won't be meeting with her until Monday next week but at least I have a contact now.  I hope she's ready :)

Alli is doing well.  She's been sick since last week with an upper respiratory infection and there's not much we can do about it but let her ride it out.  She seems to be getting on a much better sleeping schedule.  She WAS sleeping all day and awake all night but she's slowly changing that around. 

She smiles already.  I can't tell you how good of a feeling this is.  I remember that when the girls came home from the hospital (at 3, 4 & 6 weeks) it STILL took them a long time to smile.  They didn't have the muscles or reflexes to do so. So to see Alli smile is really something I love.  She also cries...really loud...when you don't have her bottle ready the second she gets hungry!  LOL

She's loved <3 p="p">

Coming home

Alli is coming home today!  I'm now limited to the amt of medical information I can share due to privacy regulations (she's not 'our' baby so her rights are protected by the state still).  She is doing well enough to come home though so I'll  be going to pick her up today :)

She doesn't cry much at all and pretty much just sleeps, eats and poops lol.  I'm assuming this is the calm before the storm and eventually she'll just start screaming all the time.  I've asked several professionals for some contacts to people who have dealt with this specific situation before and surprisingly enough I'm not getting anywhere with that.  I have heard over and over that they will 'see what they can find/do' but I haven't had anyone follow up on it.  As medically complex as she is/may be - I'll be very proactive in her medical treatment and making sure she gets as early an intervention as I can manage.  It's a tough situation being that she is still in state custody and will remain that way for some period of time.  I don't have 'permission to treat' but I don't believe my requests will be denied. 

The girls are excited for Alli to come home too.  They were able to see her in the hospital yesterday and they even got to feed her.  Walking through the hall after our visit, Emily says "Mom I've been wanting a baby for SO LONG now!"  Ummmm...this was news to me.  If someone could maybe talk to her about wanting to win the lotto that would be great...

Ready for Alli

Ice cream social

Alli Brianna

Well I haven't posted in a while.  But a lot has changed in the past few days.  Looks like I'll have to start a new 365 since we're making an addition to our family.  Her name is Alli Brianna Sanford.

My sister had a baby without telling anyone she was pregnant.  She isn't able to keep Alli but we're a family and she will remain part of this family as long as we have a say.  The way she came into this world doesn't quite matter - all that matters is that she will have a healthy, safe environment with 3 older cousins to hang out with now. 

She will remain in the hospital for a few more days (maybe longer depending on how she feels and responds to her medical care).  We JUST had a tag sale last month and got rid of ALL OF OUR BABY STUFF!  And as luck would have it - we now need it all back.  The state is coming to do an inspection of our home and background checks on us to make sure that we really are offering Alli a safe and stable environment.  Once we adhere to their standards (we need a crib and car seat for starters!), and she is healthy enough to be discharged - then we will take her home. 

Just when I thought we were on the road to freedom with the girls starting full time preschool too....lol. 

Mother's Day

Yesterday we went out to breakfast at the diner.  Then we came home and the girls took naps while Pete and I got some stuff done around the house.  Then he took the girls to his parents house and I got a break for a few hours :)

Today the girls went to school while I went to work.  When I picked them up I had planned on taking them grocery shopping but they outvoted me by saying they wanted to come home and sleep 1st.  So we came home, ate lunch, took naps and then went grocery shopping!  When we came home we went next door for a quick playdate (Emily had an accident 5 minutes after we got there so that ended our playdate lol).  We made breakfast burritos for dinner and then I went back to work and Pete put the girls to bed. 

Hannah is still a bit sore from surgery.  She sneezed this morning and said it hurt.  I talked to her teacher today and asked that she not participate at gym time.  Lord I'm already asking for them to sit out of classes! 

Busy day

Yesterday I was home with the girls.  I didn't send any of them to school and we just hung out at home all day long.  Hannah is definitely still sore from her surgery so she needed the day just to relax anyway. 

Today though - we made up for lost time.  We got up and headed to Mystic Aquarium.  SO MUCH FUN!  I love that place and the girls seem to enjoy it too. 

After the aquarium we came home and I filled the pool and put the sprinkler on.  Hailey was all about playing outside but Hannah & Emily wanted to stay in and watch TV.  Until Pete came outside with the tent that he wanted to set up.......
They loved it.  They helped set up the tent and then we roasted marshmallows over the fire pit and made S'Mores.  Our awesome neighbors came over to hang out for a bit too! 

Then it was time to go to sleeeeeeeep in the tent.  Somehow I expected more anxiety over sleeping in there but there was NONE.  Right now Emily & Hailey are sleeping out there (as well as Pete) and Hannah is in her bed (and I'll be in bed as well!).  Hannah got in trouble and was made to come inside (she hit Hailey - you can't really hit the people you're gonna share a tent with so she had to come in and sleep in her own bed).  They might just last the whole night out there!  We shall see.....

Surgery

Days come and go so quickly that I think it's only been a day since I've last blooged but really it's been like 3 or 4.  Hannah had surgery on her hernia yesterday.  She did amazing and is home recovering.  She was a bit worked up when we got to the hospital so the nurse suggested we give her some meds to calm her down and it seemed to do the trick.  We were able to take her home after the surgery so she didn't need to spend the night which was really great.  Now she's home and not going back to school until Monday. 

This morning I went to work and Pete stayed home with Hannah while the other 2 went to school.  Pete had an appt this afternoon so he's off doing that now while I'm home and the girls are taking naps.  When they wake up I'm going to take Emily and Hailey to the store to get something for the grill for dinner and then we have a stop to make so we can take care of someone's puppy while they're on a long day trip.  Then it'll be home to cook out on the grill (if the rain lets up!) and have nice dinner. 

Dentist

Luckily for me - I have 3 girls who don't mind going to the doctor or the dentist.  Not only do they not mind going - but we usually go all together and sometimes (like today) that can require a lot of patience on their part. 

They each had back to back appts.  So we had the hygienist booked from 10:00 - 11:30.  We arrived at 9:45 and after 2 trips to the bathroom *one trip included Emily seeing a little girl walk into the stall next to us and upon seeing this little girls flip flops she yelps "Mommy look at her shoes!!!!" as she ducks her head under the stall to get a closer look.  We were called in to be seen.  While one was getting her teeth cleaned - the other 2 patiently waited (sharing a chair) for their turns.  We left around 11:20 and we didn't have a single problem.  No cavities and the only thing the dentist harped on was their thumb sucking.  It's not a battle we're going to fight right now. 

After the dentist I dropped the girls off to Pete's parents and then headed to work.  After work I went and picked them up (around 5:00) and then it was home to eat dinner and go to bed.  They were knocked out by 6:00 tonight. 

Different Parenting Approach

I've been doing A LOT of reading lately on parenting.  I wish kids came with instructions like baking a cake.  But they don't.  And Lord have mercy on the soul of a parent who doesn't do it the 'normal' way.  And let's define 'normal'.  Normal would be whatever THAT PARENT does.  So basically if you have a different parenting style than the person you're talking to then don't bother talking shop.  It will drive you both nuts. 

I'm NOT perfect.  But being a mom is something I take seriously.  And I only get one chance at this mom thing.  So I want to make it tolerable to all of those involved.  I'm trying to parent in a positive way without yelling (this is HARD), no time outs (this was easy for me to ditch) and with giving the girls more authority and power.  The balance is TOUGH.  But what I'm finding most difficult is changing ME.  You learn what you live right?  So my parents believed in spankings, yelling, time out, do as I say and not as I do mentality, "I'm the mom that's why" rule and so on.  It wasn't wrong - it's just not the way I want to do things.  But I fall back on that upbringing so often and it takes me time and effort to remind myself that it's not me...calm down and make the change. 

I rely HEAVILY on a timer.  I was late to school with the girls for the 1st 3 months I think.  One day I realized that we're not late because of them but we're late because of ME.  The next day I said to the girls "I'm setting the timer, when it goes off you have 4 minutes to put your shoes on.  If your shoes are on before the timer goes off, you may bring a toy of choice in the car to play with on your way to school today.  If your shoes are not on, I will help you put them on and you won't be able to bring a toy in the car."  We were on time that day.  Sure they pushed their limits and there are still days when they don't put their shoes on before the 2nd timer goes off.  But guess what?  I don't have to yell at them to put their shoes on.  It's simple - at 7:20 the alarm goes off and they know it's time for shoes.  At 7:24 I usually have 3 kids saying "hey - I beat the timer and I want to bring _____ in the car!"  No problem...your choice!  Bath time was also becoming a problem.  They want to play and whine and argue and play before taking off their clothes and getting in the tub.  So they now have 2 minutes to take their clothes off and get in the bathroom.  The other 'rule' I have is DON'T STOP MOVING!  This only makes it fun.  If they have to wiggle a leg or arm, or jump around while attempting to take off a shirt or sock - they're laughing instead of arguing with me. 

I don't give time outs anymore.  But they do get some 'chill out' time in their rooms.  If they're out of control and not able to calm down - they go to their room for some relax time.  No time limit on this - they can come out when they're calm. 

I give them choices for EVERYTHING.  "You want to put your shirt on 1st or your pants on 1st?" "Do you want your hot dog in a bun or plain?" "Do you want it cut or not cut?" "Do you want ketchup or BBQ sauce?"  Choices are IMPORTANT.  They give kids power and control without the struggle. 

AND let me recap - I'M NOT PERFECT.  So on a daily basis I falter and something goes wrong.  I'll yell or snap or start barking orders.  Those are the moments that I need to learn to control more.  If I can't control my own attitude - how can I expect the girls to control theirs?  And even though I falter - the girls are forgiving and they still call me Mommy and they still give me another chance at parenting. 

Sunday Funday

Hmmm - just logged into Blogger for the 1st time in a while and it's all different.  Hope this post doesn't get deleted.  Been a while since I've blogged.  Though so much happens - I just haven't had the umph to get back into blogging.  I'll try harder.  I feel guilty when I don't blog because it's a day I can't get back -so if I'm writing things daily it'll give the girls a look back at their life.  An internet diary ;)

So since I can't go back.  I'll move forward. 

Today we took the girls to a day tripping and getaway expo type of event.  It was full of people trying to advertise their vacation spots.  We went because the 1st 50 people would receive free tickets to the CT Science Center (at $17 a piece...we wanted them).  Long story short - we were within the 1st 20 there but the way the event was organized UNorganized...we ended up not getting tickets due to people getting them before us.  It's ok though - we had a good time.  The girls scored some neat stuff that will end up in the junk pile within a week I'm sure lol. 

When we got home - I took the girls to the park to play while Pete mowed the lawn.  Then Rosemary and Bobby came over and we all had dinner.  The girls were in bed at 6:00 and asleep by 6:01.  Lately if they don't take naps they go to bed way early.  Last night they were asleep by 5:30 and didn't wake up until 6:30 this morning.  They've pretty much been sleeping through the night without any problems.  LOVE IT!

Horsing around

Special time with Emily ;)

Rain or shine

On our way to the park

Easter 2012

Easter will always be bitter sweet to me since 2010.  The year my dad passed away and we spent 8 long days before his passing hanging out in the ICU.  Easter was spent that year trying to keep the girls happy without missing out on our last moments with my dad. 

This year we took a trip to the DC area to spend some time with Pete's cousins.  We stayed with one of his cousins and they have a 3y/o little (big!) girl...Sofia.  She is simply amazing.  What I enjoyed most was that the girls all got along.  It reminded me of times when I was little and visited with my 2 older cousins Kate & Jen.  To this day we share a bond that's more like sisters rather than cousins.  I want that for my girls but it's not something that can be forced.  Plus - the distance is far too great to spend as much time as we'd like to. 

The trips down/back were easy as it can be with 3 preschoolers.  The girls actually didn't watch any DVD's but they did have their iTouches and they played games.  They sang and they talked and watched things out of the window.  They didn't sleep much though!  It took us 9 hours to get down (we stopped A LOT).  The trip back was cut down to 7 hours.  A bit too short for Emily's standards though because she does indeed get car sick.  To her credit - she waited until we were driving down our street to say "Mommy - I'm going to throw up..."  She didn't though.  Once we got out of the car and played outside in the cool air for a while she was fine.  Next time - we'll make it a point to make longer stops.  Being car sick isn't a fun feeling :( 

We saw a lot of family while down there and the girls did surprisingly well considering their lack of social skills.  (To those that don't know them well they'd think I was crazy to say they don't have social skills but I know their potential and I see all of their personalities). 

Family is something I want for my girls.  At the end of a day - family is what you have.  You might think you have some solid friends but in the end - family is concrete.  Family is what you have when you walk away and come back years later and are able to pick up right where you left off.  Family is that who doesn't judge you for who you should be or what you should have but rather for who are and the person you've become.  It's not about money or status - it's simply about friendship and love. 

I love my family.  I miss my dad.  

HAPPY 4th BIRTHDAY!!!!

My 'babies' aren't babies anymore. Today they turned the big 04 :)

The girls are on school vacation this week and Pete & I took the day off. We took the girls to Bounce U (still a favorite place!), then out to breakfast at the Cromwell diner. After that we came home so the girls could nap. After tht we went out to dinner at Ichiro for hibachi! Then it was home to have cake. All in all it was a fantastic day ;)

Countdown to 4

I can't believe my babies will be 4 this month *sigh*.  They're not quite sure what to make of their bday yet.  Each year we've had big parties for them but they don't seem to remember.  This is the 1st year we are having a 'kid' bday party for them with their friends and cousins.  We will be partying it up at the bowling ally where all the kids will get to play t-bowl and all the adults will get to enjoy pizza and soda while watching the kids bowl.  (This was a very thought out plan.  When I attended my nieces 5th bday party I noticed parents were dropping off their kids - AND LEAVING.  This gave me heart palpitations and I swore off bday parties from that moment forward.  However; after some thought and a few drinks...I realized that there must be a way around this.  So in the invitations I made it clear that there will be pizza and soda for all the parents to enjoy while being able to watch their kids bowl and have a good time.  So far the plan is working.....LOL). 

The next day will be a smaller than usual party at the house for the girls.  More pizza and soda and maybe a few pasta dishes.  If you ask the girls what they want for their bday - Hannah & Hailey say they don't know.  Emily though...she wants the following "Christmas cards, Easter cards, toys and candy."  Yes - she is insisting on getting Christmas cards and Easter cards.  So feel free to send some along to her.  I have no idea where or why this idea is stuck in her head but I promise you she will go out and buy her own if she doesn't get any.  I love her determination and persistence...it's admirable. 

Pete and I were planning to buy the girls each a motorized car (the big ones you see at Toys R Us).  However; I'm thinking we can find some used (I know one is coming to us from my cousin) and since they're so expensive we're going to hold off.  Instead - we bought the girls a set of bunk beds (and again we are also getting a set from my cousin...thank God for hand me downs!).  The new bunk we bought is going to be absolutely perfect because the bottom is a full size futon.  This means that when the girls are sick I no longer have to make them sleep on the couch with me.  I can sleep on the futon in their room and let them be comfortable in their own beds (they don't like sleeping anywhere BUT their beds and complain constantly when I make them sleep on the couch). 

They got report cards at school.  Seriously.  I don't even know what to say about this lol.  I'm happy about their marks and remarks though there is one area they are in need of improvement and that's socialization.  They're having a hard time separating from each other in the class room and playing with other kids.  If one is separated into another group - she will play but it'll be alone.  They don't initiate conversation or play with others.  I'm not surprised by this - and I'm not even sure if it's something that needs to be addressed or if it'll just play itself out in time.  There is only 1 class for each grade in the school they're in.  Separate classrooms is out (which is fine by me!).  I may talk to the teacher and ask if it would be possible to let each one join the PreK 4 class once a week on their own.  They can each spend a day with the students there and not be focused on where or what their sisters are doing in the room.  But again - I'm not sure.  This is my 1st time at the rodeo - I don't have all the answers!  Hopefully the teachers will have some helpful feedback.  The teacher in the PreK 4 room is a teacher they had (and love) at the beginning of the school year.  They still see her everyday and are very comfortable with her.  If this weren't the case I probably wouldn't even consider the idea. 

The girls have been sick for the better part of 2 weeks now.  It all started with the stomach virus and ended up moving to croup, then sinus infections and ear infections.  Today is the 1st day they ALL seem better :)  Man I can't wait for summer! 

Miss Donna

Donna - if you're reading this I MISS YOU!!!!!  I have been thinking about you a lot lately.  I think back to the day when you showed up at my door and you did nothing but help and listen from that point on.  There was NEVER a moment when I felt that you judged me and when you were around I always felt as though you understood me.  You knew how to juggle triplets like no other!!!!!!!!  But more importantly you kept me sane more time than you know.  :)

Bit of everything

The girls will be 4 in less than a month.  I don't know why but 4 seems to be taking a toll on me.  I didn't mind when they turned 1,2 or 3.  But 4...it's almost like I'm losing my babies :(   They're becoming little people with their own opinions and their own personalities are really starting show.  Mostly what I'm noticing is that they don't need me as much anymore.  Emily especially.  She's so damn independent it drives me nuts.  It's the small things too - like the other day I handed them each a juice box.  Before I turned around - she had her straw in the box and was drinking...no help required putting it together.  I know how silly this looks reading it.  But at the moment - it broke my heart.

I also don't see ANYBODY lately unless they happen to knock on my door and walk in.  I work when the girls are in school and once I pick them up it's like time just flies by and all of a sudden it's time for dinner and bed.  Those few hours everyday are what I am cherishing most though.  I am able to spend time with the girls doing things I wouldn't otherwise have time for if I were still working full time.  Today - we printed out some coloring pages online, colored them, put stickers on them and then cut them into little pieces with scissors *that they no longer need help with :(   After that I painted their fingernails and then they put on makeup...a lot of makeup lol.  Then I gave them a bath.  Where they told me they didn't need me to wash them up because they could do it alone.  It's all these little things that are making me realize that 4 is just too old!!!!!! 

I want my babies back. 

The stomach bug returns

Well its been 2 years since the girls had the stomach bug.  Hannah spent 6 hours puking last night.  Not fun. Reset the counter.

We are almost 4!

My my time fly.  In about four weeks we will have 4 year olds.  WOW

Proud mom

The girls have music classes at school. Recently they had a Xmas concert. They had to get all dressed up and go out on stage with the rest of their class and with the Pre-K 4 students. During the concert there 3 kids that didn't sing a single word. Not one sound. I knew that the girls knew all the songs because they had been singing them for WEEKS alllllllll day long. But they must have gotten stage fright. I was still happy to see them with their class. They stayed where they were suppose to and they followed all directions. They just opted out of singing.

Today they came home from school and upon emptying out their bags I found certificates from their music teacher. They EACH sang a song in front of their class ALL BY THEMSELVES!!!!!!! Hannah was so excited to tell me how she sang "so loud mommy!". This is a huge step for them and I'm proud of all 3 of them.

I'd also like to give their music teacher a high five for acknowledging their accomplishment. She didn't have to send home a certificate but I'm sure glad she did :)